Tag Archives: Ldr advices

TIPS TO MAKE YOUR LDR PARTNER HAPPY

( work in progress)

  1. Talk about your feelings
  2. Compliment him always
  3. Constant Reassurance
  4. Send him Love letters with or without assurance
  5. Make your meeting worthwhile
  6. Give individual space
  7. Support each other in everything
  8. Limit your arguments
  9. Try out your boyfriend’s hobbies
  10. Never run out of conversation

12 REASONS WHY I LOVE HIM

Most people would say that they do not know when and how it started. They just feel it. Yes. That might be true. Love comes in unexpected way but there are reasons why you feel love towards him/her.

Here are some of the reasons why I’m head to toe in love to my boyfriend:

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1. He found me. I still do not know how exactly it happened that we were meant to be at the exact time in our lives. Two lonely hearts crossed paths. But I will be grateful for it forever.

2. He loves me instantly. Before you even knew me, you already knew. He said to me in our first date,” you can even fall in love on a first date”, I do not know what he meant by that but now I know.

3. I love him first but knowing that he loves me back making me fall for him even more.

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4. He accepted me. My light and my shadow. Everything about me. I am myself when I’m with him because he gives me light when I was in the dark.

5. He showed me himself. He opened up about his life, about his past. He allowed me to enter his life. And I showed myself.

6. He is trustworthy. I trust him with all my life and my heart. I know I am safe in his arms. I know he will protect me with his life.

7. I love his voice. He only sing for me.

8. I love his skin, his lips, nose and height.Honestly, he is the man of my dreams.

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9. He is sweet and thoughtful. He knows what I like and give it without me asking and I appreciate it a lot. That is why I am returning the favor and send him something sweet. (See it in my other blog)

10. He is funny. In front of other people, he is a very shy type of guy but with me, he is himself.

11. He makes me feel like I am the most beautiful girl on earth. And that really boost my confidence.

12. I love how quickly I turn him on. Isn’t it one of the important aspects in relationship as well? (This is private haha)

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These are some of the reasons why but without noticing all these I just love him the way he is . On how we are everyday. Wether long distance or together. We just enjoy each other’s company and have fun together.

How To Keep a Long Distance Relationship

Few people are messaging me, singles or taken, asking on how i keep my long distance relationship on fire.
Handling the relationship varies the type of personality you and your partners have. Getting to know each other. That’s the basic. Spending time together or being honest with each other will help you understand and build a stronger foundation in this type of relationship.

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I have 5 steps here that actually work might help you survive a long distance relationship.

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  1. Always Communicate

Communication is essential. Without this, you will feel disconnected with your special someone. You cannot have a better understanding to your online date or girlfriend and cannot create a strong bond despite being away from each other. Whether it is through call, text, chat emails, video call, anytime or anywhere.    
Yo won’t be updated what is going on with his or her on the other side of the world.

For me and Shaun, since his is 4 hours ahead of me, he always first greeted me a morning messages then tell me about his morning or even his dreams. As soon as i wake up each morning, i always first check his messages and respond to it.  At first, you will feel that this is tiring or boring but if you make it a habit then you will lacking without messaging each other about anything. I did not aiming for a respond right away because we respect each others time. We are both working so we message when we can and check as soon as we have time.

Also, you have to consider a good way to communicate. We only use viber since Shaun does not have any social media account. Thankful for viber that is equipped with the things we needed in communication.

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“Without communication, there is no relationship. Without respect, there is no love. Without trust, there’s no reason to continue.”

2. Trust Each Other

Trust plays a vital part in a healthy relationship especially in a long distance relationship. Why? Because you are not together. Your partner cannot see how are you doing, what are you doing or who you are with. Most of the relationship in LDR falls apart because of it. Most people don’t give trust right away in the early stage of their relationship. Trust needs to be earn. Trust are invested, that if this falls apart, then its DONE.

I’ve been in a long distance relationship before that i even begged someone to trust me but he failed to accept it. It was hard not to be trusted because i know myself i did not do anything wrong and i keep hoping and praying that person sees it. I did everything and it’s depressing. Still he did not trust me. But later i realized, i was not the problem. It was him. That was when i started not trusting anyone right away. Because i know myself. I am always honest. Before i trust someone, he or she should be honest to me as well.

For Shaun and I, we always tell each other about anything. No secrets. Whenever we went and who we are with. For example, i went to Iloilo, he knows that is faraway from Manila so i keep him updated so that he will feel that his with me during my travel. If I’m with friends, i always send him pictures or videos during the event. Introduce him to people i am with at that moment.

Without trust, we won’t be here. We won’t last long.

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3.Respect and Accept One’s Personality

Shaun is introvert. That one word tells everything. I, on the other hand, an extrovert. May be the reason we stay strong and stay this long it’s because we are totally opposite. Because of our opposite personalities we keep learning or discovering things to each other.

Being serious is too boring. You have to be sweet, funny, naughty, diligent, and creative. If you can be all of that then trust me, that will help you to win someone’s heart easily.

Even Shaun wants a quiet environment, i tend to make things fun for him. He knows i hate boring environment and i know he hates noisy or loud sounds. So we tend to respect what we like or dislike and give each other’s time.

Timing is the key. Overdoing it is a big No.

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4. Virtual Dates

Find a creative way to spend each other time despite the distance. Shaun initially thought of this idea. We accidentally ate the same food one Saturday and he thought of eating the same food each Saturdays. I find it very cute coming from a guy. Usually, girls though of cute things in a relationship.

We started that since 2017 and until now we are still doing it even together. It’s like a tradition for us that our week won’t be complete without it. During Saturdates we talk a lot of things like future activities, how we are for the week during work or talk about other people.

Most couples do online games together as their bonding time or watch the same movies. So, think of a creative ways to spend time with your LDR partner.

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5. Sending Gifts, Letters or Visit

Giving provides greater satisfaction than receiving.

An online relationship won’t be complete without meeting each other. But don’t push it on someone. I know some people who are pushing their partners to meet them in person. First, we have to consider the financial capacity of our partner. We don’t love them for money in the first place. Unless thats your ulterior motive in online dating. There is a right time for that and probably your partner is already saving for it.

Since i can’t visit Shaun to his country, i thought of sending him a package. I am not sending him gifts just because i want something in return. He even told me that letters i made are enough and haven’t thought he will get lots. He really appreciated it because no one has ever done that for him. It makes me happy because that’s my purpose, to make him happy.

If you are reading this now, start making your move. Follow my steps and message me how it goes.

You guys can also reach me via instagram. I’ll be happy to help you and giving you advices through my experience.

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How To Forget Your Ex LDR Boyfriend

In order to love who you are you cannot hate the experiences that shaped you.

LDR or not it is the same feeling – we love. Love comes in any shapes and sizes. It only varies how deep you love that person and for what reason. But experiencing good love gone bad is so painful. The pain which prevents us from moving forward. We all know that moving on isn’t easy. While time is the best healer, let me tell you how i moved on.

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After my last LDR break up, I had several sleepless night with non stop cries. Imagine yourself dying inside but need to keep on living. Pretending that everything was fine. I thought, no one will noticed but it reflected in my productivity. I told my supervisor what I’ve been going through. I’m not the type of person to randomly open a sensitive issue involving myself. I thought they will only laugh at it.

But an open ears, open mind and shoulders to cry on helped me clear my thoughts. Because i was  so negative. I have no will to live. I even thought about suicide many times. Luckily, I have a phobia of cuts – an open wound. I also distanced myself with everyone. I only wanted to cry and sleep every night. Only God and few friends knew what i did just to forget the pain.

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One day, i just woke up, faced the mirror and hated the way i look. I felt so ugly. I realized this is not what i want for myself. I felt angry. I wanted revenge if possible. I slowly fixed what was broken. I wanted to be strong and showed them what they’ve lost.

Figuring out how to move on from a relationship is one of the most difficult transitions in a person’s life. But it somehow come out naturally.
These are the steps that helped me move on.

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1. Cut the connection

I realized that i cannot move on if i still have his contact information. Because whenever i missed him, i easily sent him any messages. The more i message him, the more i wanted him to respond. If he responded, i was hoping we can fix what we had. It was hard. There were times that i deleted all his information, but find ways to have it back from my record. But in the end, i managed to do it. Congratulations if you did! You feel relieved. I’m telling you.

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2. Practice forgiveness

At first, i had many “why’s”. Why he replaced me? Why her? Why not me? I never felt so insecure in my entire life. After i learning it the hard way and accepting the fact why it happened, i finally understood that you can’t easily manipulate someone’s heart. To where it beats. You can avoid or control but once you’re drown with those feelings, it is hard to get out. He met her with a circle of friends in a bar. They bonded. Enjoy each other’s company then fell in love. For someone like me that is far from him, i only saw him or talked to him via phone. We can’t touch each other. I felt that i can’t compete with her. When i decided to let go, i wished them their happiness and hoped that the choice he made was right. I forgive him. But I cannot forget what he did.

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3. Love yourself

How can i fight a war if i look miserable? If i continue to be hurt then it will reflect on my appearance and everyone will feel sorry for me. We don’t want that, do we? I changed myself. Not only physically, but aslo emotionally.

4. Focus on other things

Keep yourself busy. Do what you like/love. I know that when we are heart broken, we only focus on being hurt. We tend to forget the things that once makes us feel alive.

  • Travel – wether if with friends or alone. Exploring new places refreshes our soul.

  • Focus on your job – we always hear that we should set aside personal matters when we are at work but sometimes it’s not that easy. But if there are available projects, grab the opportunity to make yourself busy. Remind yourself why you need to work.

  • Spend time with family – no one can understand you better than your family. Not everyone has that family we can rely on but if you do, it will help a lot.

  • Hang out with friends – go out with friends. Do some food trips, slumber party, go to salon, clubbing, drinking or etc. Good friends are good for the heart. Who will always there to listen to your nonsense and do crazy things together. They make you feel you are not alone. But avoid those bad influences, of course.

  • Sports / Workouts – some people who are heartbroken focuses themselves on sports or workouts because it makes us happy. Scientifically explained that exercise makes us happy because of endorphin’s releases from our body. These triggers a positive feeling. Today’s generation is the most out of shape. You may hate to admit it but sometimes is the reason why you look for someone else. Being fit makes you feel good, confident and beautiful.

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5. Find new love

The most effective way for me is to date someone else. You may think it’s a rebound. Yes and no. We easily fall in love when we are at our vulnerable state. When i finally understood that it’s really over with my ex, i told myself, i can find someone better. I felt that i am not at fault to let myself be wasted. I made myself look good again and signed up to dating sites. That’s where i met Shaun. I was in my moving on stage when i dated him so yes, i don’t love him at first but i like him because he is very nice. As we knew each other better, spend time together, i fell for him because he is such a great person. He saved me. He made me believe in myself that there is hope for me. He’s my new beginning and hoping until the end.

 

Having our hearts broken makes us feel stronger and wiser the next time we met someone new. Don’t be afraid to love again because you already knew how it feels to be broken. You were there and manage to move on. That’s how strong you are. Don’t let your past be a hindrance to your bright future.

Avoid These Five Types of People on Online Dating Sites

STOP CHATTING if you notice some signals. Not only you save your time and effort, but also to save yourself from getting hurt.

I have been in online dating for almost 6 years now and I experienced a lot before I found my boyfriend. So I want to personally share these tips for aspiring singles who dare to seek love online.

These LDR tips I am going to share are based from my personal experiences. 

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1. Beware of FAKE PROFILES. Admit it. Good pictures usually caught our attention first before we check through the details. Even the if the pictures are not good enough but a good background attracts us. They use fake identities which I completely understand why – for good and bad purposes.

We know that being pretty or handsome still top of our list so people will try everything to make themselves look better. And I am not exempted to this because I love filter apps but not to the extent it will totally change my appearance.

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I really hate poser account. A guy from UK chatted me in facebook before. He is handsome alright. I never demanded a video call because my phone was not advance. So I am contented with sharing photos and chatting with him. In our 3 mos of dating, he confessed. He said it was not him. So I felt very nervous that time. But when he sent me his real pictures with sign in it. I like him even more. Because the real him is more handsome. He is not confident enough. I can not understand how guys look themselves in the mirror. Anyway, it is still bad to use other people’s images.

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This one is the weirdest among fake profiles. Chatting to a guy without knowing it’s a girl and vice versa. Really creepy. For example scenario, try watching Tulfo in Action on YouTube.

2. NO VIDEO CALL. Thanks for cheap phones that we all can afford to communicate easily. So I can see no reason to be fooled by these catfishes. Still, there are some who are victimized. Because fake people tend to be good at chatting and great for making alibis not to video call. Super signal.

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3. SCAMMER.

The type we all are familiar with. Whether it is a guy or a girl. It is the same. Asking for money to random people who you do not know or to someone you chatted as your victim is a signal. Please ununderstand that these people work hard for their money too. Search for it and you will read lots of scam stories. The most common alibi they use is a sick family member.

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4.PERVERT ALERT. 

Okay let’s not be hypocrites here. Some of us are willing to share our sexy photos to our online dates including me but if they tend to ask beyond of what you can share like asking for nudes then block that person right away. Some guys randomly asks for naked pictures after few talks. So annoying.

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5. PSYCHO. 

This one is the hardest to determine especially in chatting. I even chatted someone who calls me a psycho. What?! Just because I am arguing with him does not define me for being one. This signal pertains to rapists,killers,ill people so be careful. I can not personally say how but I read and watch news a lot. My only experience of talking to a psycho is that I chatted this guy before then it was like talking to different person. His mood swing is very extreme. We argued a lot in chat so I stop.

That’s all. Share some opinion in the comments below!

Photo credits to google images.

How It All Started

“You don’t inspire people by being perfect. You inspire them by how you deal with your imperfections.”

I was just a normal student who only wants to survive  college while doing some part time job until free Facebook came.

No one can refuse with free things, right? Unless, you are well off already.

It was December 2013, when my phone was only Nokia 3110c and can accessed the internet via mobile data connection. I also want to thank Globe Telecom that time because for the free Facebook access. It was there i exposed myself to online dating.

Am i only searching for foreigner? No.
Do i prefer white people that time? No.
Do i know any dating site or apps that time? No.

I only have free facebook access with my Nokia phone.

The enjoyment of having free access for a poor person such as myself was like heaven. I was able to join groups and talk with anyone. I spoke with a lot of guys from different countries and cultures like Indian, American, British Filipino etc, etc,.

Before online dating, i had no luck with any Filipino guy i fancied. Same as, not liking those guys who liked me back then.
Until one British guy i met from a Facebook group constantly chatting me and i fell for him.

He was my first foreigner i dated online. We never video called because of my phone. He even  fooled me by using someone else’s photos but in the end, took the courage to send me his real photo. He’s handsome actually.
He even sent me a Me To You teddy from UK. He even promised to attend my graduation.

To cut the story short, we broke up after 3 months because of some reasons.

1. I have limited resources to communicate with him.
2. He was broken when we first chatted but later i discovered they’re back in each other’s arms.
3. I was too immature to handle a relationship even online since i don’t have any real life experiences with special someone.

I was heartbroken because i thought i love him that much that i let this affect my studies. To think, i was a graduating student. A crucial stage of my life.

I am far away from my family. That time, all i have was friends. I became so busy with my projects that i slowly forgotten him. But there were times, before i close my eyes each night, i remembered him then cried. He already deleted his Facebook account.

I was moving on when i got back to online dating again. I checked my inbox and received many messages from strangers. i later realized that i only entertained white guys. I admit, i was looking for someone who almost look like him that time.

I think, he’s the reason why i prefer white guys. Because i fell in love with how he looked, how he talked to me and taught me how online dating works. In addition to that, I’m an avid fan with American shows or movies and English Ebooks.

I did not know what other people’s purpose there are but all i want is LOVE. Online dating showed me the easiest way to find it. And until now, I’m still in a long distance relationship!


Lessons i learned:

  • Never enter a relationship if not ready.
  • Don’t give everything so easily.
  • Focus on studies first.
  • Not all frees are free!