Few people are messaging me, singles or taken, asking on how i keep my long distance relationship on fire.
Handling the relationship varies the type of personality you and your partners have. Getting to know each other. That’s the basic. Spending time together or being honest with each other will help you understand and build a stronger foundation in this type of relationship.
I have 5 steps here that actually work might help you survive a long distance relationship.
- Always Communicate
Communication is essential. Without this, you will feel disconnected with your special someone. You cannot have a better understanding to your online date or girlfriend and cannot create a strong bond despite being away from each other. Whether it is through call, text, chat emails, video call, anytime or anywhere.
Yo won’t be updated what is going on with his or her on the other side of the world.
For me and Shaun, since his is 4 hours ahead of me, he always first greeted me a morning messages then tell me about his morning or even his dreams. As soon as i wake up each morning, i always first check his messages and respond to it. At first, you will feel that this is tiring or boring but if you make it a habit then you will lacking without messaging each other about anything. I did not aiming for a respond right away because we respect each others time. We are both working so we message when we can and check as soon as we have time.
Also, you have to consider a good way to communicate. We only use viber since Shaun does not have any social media account. Thankful for viber that is equipped with the things we needed in communication.
2. Trust Each Other
Trust plays a vital part in a healthy relationship especially in a long distance relationship. Why? Because you are not together. Your partner cannot see how are you doing, what are you doing or who you are with. Most of the relationship in LDR falls apart because of it. Most people don’t give trust right away in the early stage of their relationship. Trust needs to be earn. Trust are invested, that if this falls apart, then its DONE.
I’ve been in a long distance relationship before that i even begged someone to trust me but he failed to accept it. It was hard not to be trusted because i know myself i did not do anything wrong and i keep hoping and praying that person sees it. I did everything and it’s depressing. Still he did not trust me. But later i realized, i was not the problem. It was him. That was when i started not trusting anyone right away. Because i know myself. I am always honest. Before i trust someone, he or she should be honest to me as well.
For Shaun and I, we always tell each other about anything. No secrets. Whenever we went and who we are with. For example, i went to Iloilo, he knows that is faraway from Manila so i keep him updated so that he will feel that his with me during my travel. If I’m with friends, i always send him pictures or videos during the event. Introduce him to people i am with at that moment.
Without trust, we won’t be here. We won’t last long.
3.Respect and Accept One’s Personality
Shaun is introvert. That one word tells everything. I, on the other hand, an extrovert. May be the reason we stay strong and stay this long it’s because we are totally opposite. Because of our opposite personalities we keep learning or discovering things to each other.
Being serious is too boring. You have to be sweet, funny, naughty, diligent, and creative. If you can be all of that then trust me, that will help you to win someone’s heart easily.
Even Shaun wants a quiet environment, i tend to make things fun for him. He knows i hate boring environment and i know he hates noisy or loud sounds. So we tend to respect what we like or dislike and give each other’s time.
Timing is the key. Overdoing it is a big No.
4. Virtual Dates
Find a creative way to spend each other time despite the distance. Shaun initially thought of this idea. We accidentally ate the same food one Saturday and he thought of eating the same food each Saturdays. I find it very cute coming from a guy. Usually, girls though of cute things in a relationship.
We started that since 2017 and until now we are still doing it even together. It’s like a tradition for us that our week won’t be complete without it. During Saturdates we talk a lot of things like future activities, how we are for the week during work or talk about other people.
Most couples do online games together as their bonding time or watch the same movies. So, think of a creative ways to spend time with your LDR partner.
5. Sending Gifts, Letters or Visit
Giving provides greater satisfaction than receiving.
An online relationship won’t be complete without meeting each other. But don’t push it on someone. I know some people who are pushing their partners to meet them in person. First, we have to consider the financial capacity of our partner. We don’t love them for money in the first place. Unless thats your ulterior motive in online dating. There is a right time for that and probably your partner is already saving for it.
Since i can’t visit Shaun to his country, i thought of sending him a package. I am not sending him gifts just because i want something in return. He even told me that letters i made are enough and haven’t thought he will get lots. He really appreciated it because no one has ever done that for him. It makes me happy because that’s my purpose, to make him happy.
If you are reading this now, start making your move. Follow my steps and message me how it goes.
You guys can also reach me via instagram. I’ll be happy to help you and giving you advices through my experience.